The Easter Parade

There are actually three Easter Parades in the French Quarter. The first two are all the "society" ladies in their dresses and flowered hats; all very southern belle. The third parade of the day is the Gay Easter Parade; same horse drawn carriages and floats, but a lot of white tuxedos and a lot of drag.

Of course the first person we saw was...

Princess Stephanie, (who else!)


Robert and I had attended an Easter brunch at our friend Goerge's house earlier, (George is the one with the square toilet, see Mardi Gras journal entry...), and then went to view the parade which meandered through the Quarter. Robert never misses a chance to wear a festive hat, and today was no exception.

Robert in his Easter Bonnet; that hat has
everything on it but the kitchen sink!


We spent some time on the Balcony at Oz before the parade reached Bourbon Street and I spotted this guy wearing a Dolce and Gabbana wife beater!
Fashion statement?


Later he and his boyfriend were at the buffet.


Then the parade came by. We knew quite a few of the people on the carriages and floats and got lots of beads, (like I need any more in the house!). There were some very lovely hats, a couple of good Jazz marching bands and a lot of people on the streets. One of the people we saw on the street had won an Easter hat contest; very pretty hat, huge, with all fresh flowers. He competed using the name Jennifer Flowers. hehe.

A parade lovely!


After the parade, the streets between the bars filled up and we went around talking to the various people that we knew and ducking into the bars to view the holiday dancing boys. We finally ended up on Lafitte's balcony, where I met a really nice guy from NYC. We talked for about 15 minutes, and then he had to go and we had to go. sigh. Another lovely New Orleans holiday...

Next up, Jazz Fest!

Well, I just thought of two Ken stories...

...and they aren't all that long, but they are a good introduction to Ken.

Ken used to live near the river...
..in an area that was up and coming; people were renovating the bungalos and Creole cottages, the property values were rising. But there was a problem; a few local crack dealers had taken over the payphone at the end of the block. Someone was always there, deals were done and ocassionally someone was shot to death. The new upscale residents found this distressing; they were worried about the property values, and also, somewhat for their lives. So they banded together and got a petition up to send to South Central Bell asking that this payphone be removed due to it's bad influence on the neighborhood. SCBell responded with a lot of crap about freedom of speech, but in fact they were not going to remove a profitable payphone. Some of the more daring of the group damaged the phone, but because it was such a profitable payphone, it was always repaired immediately! One or two of the neighbors were so upset that they actually talked to Ken about this problem, even though he was just a lowly renter and did not own any property.

His solution was so simple and sooo neat, and as he loves to say, "so convenient, I could do it in a few extra minutes on my way home from work!"

Ken would carry with him, a plastic bag and as he passed the little park where every one of the new property owners walked their dogs, he would select the freshest dog do and then carry it down the rest of the block to the pay phone where he would proceed to wipe it all over the hand set, then hang the phone up, toss the plastic bag into the bushes near by and turn the corner for home. He did this everyday for two weeks and at the end of the month, Bell South yanked the phone. No more nasty drug dealers.

The neighbors all congratulated them selves on their hard work to rid the area of the bad drug dealers. Not one of them knew what Ken did and he didn't care. He told me whistfully, "God, durlx! They are all so dumb! I feel sorry for them, no not sorry... I pity the poor fools! But I had to do something, you know, someone has to watch out for them." And then he said, "Thank you, durlx, I will have another shot of vodka!" (Many of the Ken stories end with this same line.....)

There was another evening...

...when Ken and I were sitting at the bar enjoying a particularly diverse selection of adult beverages and he turned to me, (he is deaf in one ear, so he always turns towards you to speak), and said, "You know, durlx, I'm getting older... Since I am no longer pretty, I've decided to try and be popular!" And then he laughed hysterically, maniacally for several minutes.

The really funny thing is, that he did exactly that.

Now, I know these two charming tales might get you to thinking that Ken is just a sweet, funny, offbeat sort of guy. A harmless, goofy amusing sort of person. OMG! You would be so wrong!!! Run, run for your lives! It's much deeper and darker than that. And much more amusing...

Ken, My "Colorist", Psychic and Friend.



Ken, my dear friend, came over today to "do" my hair as he has done for many years. After looking at the pic above, you might wonder why anyone would let him get near their face with a pair of very sharp scissors! But I assure you, it's safe, (as long as he has decided that he likes you...hehe.) Ken is a very remarkable individual and in the years I have known him, I have been furious with him, delighted with him, in tears with him... we've been thrown out of bars together... oh, there's another lot of stories... In the pic above, he showed up at my friend (and his) Margaret's house on Thanksgiving to help serve the meal. His outfit for the day was fairly normal, except for the fake tits... Ken always throws something into the mix! And he can not lie, which always starts all kinds of trouble, but those of us who know him and have grown to love him can't help but laugh. He's always right, in what he says, no matter how many bloated egos explode.


And he loves his mama.
Ken and his mom, on her 83rd birthday.


Where you paying attention? The woman is 83 and the party was held at The Phoenix, the neighborhood gay bar. She is amazing; last fall she almost died, Ken was called home, it was supposed to be the end. Well, she's 85 now and she just recently started driving again! (Listen to me now, children. If you have good genes, you have everything! If you don't all the granola in the world won't save you.)

Ken's Mom at Christmas two years ago.
Ken and Margaret in background.


Look at her! She was so fabulous that day! (Ken told me the night before, Christmas Eve, as we were having a drink with his Mom at The Phoenix, that he was going to do the "Katherine Hepburn thing" for his mom for Christmas Day.) What a good son! He let all her beauty shine through.

Ken is very good at this sort of thing. Now, do you wonder why I let him cut my hair?

There are a great many "Ken stories". And all those Margaret stories. I've got to write them. There's just so much there that would be fun to tell, and to read.

Do you think I could get a grant?

Greg The Bunny

Tonight I watched the new show Greg The Bunny on Fox and I have to say that it was all right. I read a review that said the show gets funnier as it goes along, and I hope that's true, because the bunny is cute, and so is Seth Green. I've had a soft spot (or sould I say hard spot...) for Seth for years. Before he did anything big, he did a local commercial here in the New Orleans area that was so popular that one of the phrases he used became part of a cheer at Saints games and he actually made an appearence at one of the games. He's done a lot of films and TV since then, including both Austin Powers movies.

He's just as cute as a button, and you can read all about him on his official site.




Princess Stephanie

Princess Stephanie and her beloved.


The weekend of the St. Joseph parade, I ran into Princess Stephanie. But then, I always run into the princess whenever I go out for an evening of fun. I don't know how she does it, but she is always everywhere and anywhere that something fun is happening. One couple that we were out with said that they had recently run into her in Atlanta, and one after another, people started recounting P.S. sightings. When does this gurl sleep? This particular evening, the princess was there to compete in the Miss Trailer Park contest at the Good Friends Bar. Unfortuntely, I have no pictures; the crowd was simply too dense for me to get anywhere near the stage.

Princess Stephanie has branched out into the field of journalism. She writes a column for The Whiz Magazine, one of those pocket sized bar guides that has all the weekly gay New Orleans activities listed. If you're coming to town, it's an invaluable resource (should I be unable to personally escort you about...) and if you attend any of the special events listed, you're very likely to see Princess Stephanie in the flesh. Tell her durlx sent you.

Flavio Caesar





It's kind of funny, I first saw Flavio Caesar on the spanish channel, it was a talk show... I don't speak spanish very well now and didn't then, but I watched the entire hour, he had such beautiful eyes. This guy didn't break out like Ricky Martin, but he's a very big star in Mexico, very big in Spain...

This link should take you to the English version of his page. Flavio Caesar. Don't miss "My Prohibited Labyrinth" or "Throwing, I Relax".

enjoy.

Yesterday



Yesterday luca and I toured the Garden District a bit and went to one of the old cemeteries.

Lafayette Cemetery No. 1


This particular cemetery is across the street from the well known Commander's Palace restaurant in the "heart of the Garden District", which was mostly an "American" area, as opposed to the Creole areas of the city. For those of you who do not know the story, people were buried in above ground crypts in New Orleans, (they still are today to some extent...), because the caskets used to pop up out of the ground during flooding when they were buried in the ordinary way. I suspect there were other factors... the bodies were layed in the crypts and then the little door was sealed. The brick enclosure and the heat tended to work like a little oven to speed the decomposition of the bodies and help reduce the danger of spreading disease. Also, there just wasn't all that much land available for burial and the system was an efficient use of space; when it was time to put someone else in the crypt, the remains of the previous family member were pushed to the back to make room for the next occupant.

Once a year, on All Saints Day, the whole family would come to the cemetery with a picnic lunch and white wash the tomb, doing any repairs that were necessary, clean up the grounds and put flowers and candles out.

a little city of the dead


The old cemeteries of New Orleans fell into a state of disrepair over the years as some of the families and organizations that were responsible for the care of the tombs died out. Some of the tombs are totally gone, others damaged; there is now a group called "Save Our Cemetaries" that devotes it's energy to preserving the cemeteries and their history. The Lafayette Cemetery No. 1 has become a very popular tourist spot since Anne Rice placed her Vampire Lestat there and also made it the resting place of the Mayfair Family from her novels. Her descriptions of the Garden District area of New Orleans are very much to the mark.

After that, we had lunch at an Indian restaurant and then went shopping on Magazine Street, a street full of antique shops, art galleries, all kinds of interesting shops. We found a place with a very large collection of Newcomb pottery, (although for some reason I keep thinking of "nukem", hehe.). Eventually, we got down the street to one of my favorite shops, Prince and Pauper. They have a huge and truly eclectic collection of stuff! luca found, among other things a 4 foot tall hand carved wooden frog dressed like "Mr.Toad" of Toad Hall for an incredibly reasonable price.(pics later.)

Then, we headed home for a rest. We headed back into the Quarter to meet Mike and his roomie, Lynn at the Napoleon House for dinner.
Lynn, Mike and luca... hehe.


Fabulous evening! We spent hours talking and eating in the gas lit courtyard. Maybe I'm just lucky, but the people I've met from this GayCams group have all been interesting and fun; this night was no exception. We parted company in front of the Napoleon House and luca and I headed home.

luca left about 11 AM this morning. Got a call from him about six; he had made it safely to Houston, although he was almost in a wreck when a rake fell off of a truck right in front of him and almost went under his car at 70 mph! (I'm sure this is true, but luca was probably doing eighty at the time, hehe.).

Hey, this was a very nice week! Good to see luca again, very nice to meet Mike and Lynn, (and Baby). Very nice indeed!

I'll be in chat tonight at 11PM CST. Hope to see you there!




and....thanks to luca for the pics of the cemetery... I looked at mine and then had a very stoopid moment during which I erased all of them!

Luca, Man of Mystery.

Luca's leg...


As you may know, luca has been here since Tuesday. We've had a great time, but then we always do. Yesterday was a little rainy and rather hot and humid. We did some walking around in the Quarter, ate lunch at The Napoleon House, (fabu muffalettas) and went to a voodoo shop, (where luca stocked up on various charms, spells and black candles. hmmmmm, what does this mean for future visits!.)

As always, he remains a man of mystery and does not allow his face to be seen by the general public, but I was able to snap this candid pic.

luca in the middle


We stopped for coffee and beignets at the Cafe Du Monde...

coffee, beignets and luca's hand


...and afterwards walked along the river and through the Riverwalk.

Today, we are going to a cemetery uptown and will tour the Garden District. Perhaps we'll run into Anne Rice! Later, we may be meeting with Mike and Lynn for dinner. More pics tomorrow.

Mike (spudpuppy) is in town.

Mike aka spudpuppy.


Mike is here for Pittcon, a huge convention going on this week. I met him and his roommate, Lynn, this evening for coffee at Cafe Du Monde and then dinner at The Coffee Pot, followed by some strolling around and lots of conversation. (We were going to go to The Napoleon House for dinner, but they were mysteriously closed this evening. Same thing happened the first time luca was here. hmmmmm.)

Mike and Darryl


Mike, Lynn and Baby (the short one).


I had a great time and am looking forward to seeing them again later in the week.
BTW, take a look at Mike's Site. His webcam is live from New Orleans!

luca gets here tomorrow!

I never did much "chat".

I was shy enough that I couldn't get my comments in on time,

And often, I just couldn't keep up with what was going on.

Of course, now that I have my own chat room, it's very different! Thanks to everyone who was there tonight! It was wonderful.

hehe.

and one more pic from the coast...


no comment.

And really, thanks so much to j2 for the pics!

St. Joseph's Day in the Quarter

The official St. Joseph's Alter Float


The St. Joe's parade is always so much fun! I love this parade! It's always a scream; it takes forever to wind it's way through the French Quarter, they keep stopping at bars for drinks! The St. Joseph's Alter float was sponsored this year by Harrah's Casino, hehe.

Cute kiddies on the alter float


Pretty Deb


This parade features all these "dance groups" from the area "dance schools". They march and dance their way through the Quarter to the beat of the most lascivious hard beat rap songs dressed up like Brittany Spears!

This was the best group, The Dominators.


These girls were good and hot! And they marched with their very hot boi friends in their Dominator tee shirts. Totally deliscious!

There are lots more pics and lots more to tell, but that will all come in later installments. I really did have a great time tonight. The Italian American parade has always been one of my favs and I was there with some good friends. A very good night.

Robert, durlx, Mike, and George on the balcony at Lafitte's.


BTW, I just met Mike tonight for the first time. It's turns out that we know soooo many of the same people! More on that later.

Also, I saw Princess Stephanie again tonight; well, I always run into her! That's another future entry!

Late Breaking WeHo News!

Ladies and Germs, bois and gurls, these shocking photos of a message board evening meeting in WeHo have just been eeel-lectronically sent to me so that I might post them for your edification.

Where shall we six meet again!
Scotty, Mikey, Mikey Salad, Dan, Alex, Shane.


I don't have any details of this amazing meeting of the minds at this time, I only have these raw photographs...

Mikey Salad and Alex


Alex, dear, have you been drinking! hehe!

And the most shocking candid photo of all!

a special shot for r@!


This is fabulous!

Oh! The humanity!

Shit, Pussy and Goddam! I wish I had been there!

All photos by j2.

We Are Not Speaking...

lil' Puddin' AKA "Bad Kitty" born 1997


I was sitting at the desk with the screen door open to the front to let the air through the house and to let a certain animal that happens to live here be able to look out on the street and enjoy the activity. Then, I heard the screen door open. I went quickly to the door to see and there was my cat in a cat fight! She was beating the crap out of one of the local males! They were rolling over and over and making a lot of noise, but not as much as I was making! (Not that either of them was listening to me!)

Puddin' had never been that far outside before, let alone in a fight with an alhpa male from the hood. She won. I have to admit that I felt a little bit of pride in her prowess and she didn't seem to be physically hurt at all, but I knew what this meant. Now, she thinks that everything in front of the house is her territory. I spent 45 minutes trying to lure her back into the house. (Robert came out and tried to help. I was freaking out a bit.) I talked to her sweetly, offered her treats, but was she listening? No, she was a wild animal ready to scratch anyone who came near her! And she had to roll and roll in every stinky thing she could find! I finally had to break out the special bird thing on a wire toy to get her back in the house. (I am so mad about this...she'll never see it again..!)

She thinks she is really hot shit now. She is in no way sorry for getting into a fight on the street because she won this time. She has no idea about the bigger cats she could have run into and the cars she could have run under. All she knows is that she owns the front yard.

I'm going to have to re-enforce that screen door.

She is really going to hate the flea bath.

Bad Kitty.

Gardening With A Vengeance!

I think I've mentioned this before in posts on the message boards; gardening in New Orleans is mostly a matter of killing off what you don't want in your yard. Things grow very quickly, (vines will actually grow towards you and curl around your finger, if you let them..) and each season brings an entire new host of different plants that just pop up every year and shade out the stuff that was there before. Ten years ago a neighbor of mine on one end of the block planted Morning Glories and they now have grown through the back yards and clear across to the other side of the block filling most of the middle of it. You would almost have to sterilize the soil to stop it.

The yard today.


As you can see, it's a disaster back there right now. I had about twenty banana trees over 20 feet tall and the freeze did them wrong. It didn't really kill them; it just made them into a large mess, (It's very hard to kill them.). So I've begun to cut them down to get rid of the dead and overgrown stuff. Now, these aren't hardwoods, hehe. They're very soft and full of juice; I can cut through a 12" diameter tree in a minute with a hand saw, but the "juice" sprays all over and stains light clothing forever. And one has to be careful about the 140 pounds plus of stalk coming crashing down. Once they are all cut down to within a few feet of the ground, they will then come back at an almost alarming rate! But, hopefully, they will have been stunted enough not to make a bunch of bananas this year. Once they start making a big bunch of bananas the mess gets worse: first there is a "flower" that is about the size of your head that sheds big gooey bits every day for weeks, and then when the bananas in the bunch start to mature with their ends pointing in the air, the trees start to look all shredded and dry as all the energy goes into the fruit. I should mention here that the fruit of the variety that grows in my yard is more like the plaintains you see in the market.

So why do I allow these messy trees in my yard? Well, they are very hard to get rid of; you need to chop them down and then dig out the roots, and you have to do this year after year because they keep coming back. And they do create a very green and pleasantly moist shade during the hottest days of the summer. And they do it very quickly...

The yard will look like this by early summer.


Yes, they will have come back that much! And although they now shade the back half of the yard so much in the summer that no grass will grow there, they also stop most of the creepy crawler vines from covering the ground. And the light is very soothing beneath the huge green leaves.

There are other things that grow vorasciously in the yard: Night Blooming Jasmine grows everywhere and the smell of it makes me ill; certain times of the year it is just so pervasive. The Confederate Jasmine (a vine) that has grown over from Robert's yard and now covers my lattice work over the area by the back door doesn't stink so much and doesn't get out of control. There's quite a bit of wisteria, which looks like a bunch of deadwood most of the year and then suddenly in the spring explodes in a huge array of delicate blossoms. And there's this stinky nasty vine with ugly flowers that actually tries to grow into my house! I traced a vine to it's base 50 feet away and cut it. It was over two inches think at the base. Did it die? No, It wilted a bit and then put new roots into the ground every few feet and continued to thrive better than ever. My vigilence must be never ending. But in the fall, a whole 'nother bunch of plants comes in, including a kind of large leafed clover with tiny little flowers that covers the ground completely and overcomes what was there before.

In a way, I kind of like the way it all works in my yard. I grew up on a farm in upstate NY and I love horrifying my Dad with the tales of the "incredible creeping vines" and killer plants. Up north, we spent so much effort nurturing our plants so they would make for us something to eat. The "weeds" were fairly easy to get rid of; we just hoped for enough rain and sun so that our hard work would pay off. In New Orleans, it's like vampire gardening

Junk Food and the Food Nazis

A ways back I started talking about food and how bad most of the pre-prepared, "quick-to-fix" stuff is. This expensive garbage takes up a lot of shelf space in the average chain supermarket, so it must be selling. The question is, why are people buying it?

With the huge popularity of the Food Channel and the hundreds of other cooking shows on TV, you would think that many people were cooking more at home, and yet the microwavable "something in a bowl" is the fastest growing retail grocery item. Have we become food voyeurs, getting off on great cuisine when it's on the screen, but settling for a culinary hand job in real life?

I think people settle for less than good when it comes to the food that they eat for two reasons. The first is that they haven't learned basic cooking skills. Maybe they feel that it's not interesting enough or too difficult. Yet most people learn how to drive a car or do some kind of job and isn't being able to feed yourself at least that important? And being able to have friends over for meal is certainly one of the great things in life. Yet many people lack this ability. I've even met quite a few people who are indifferent about food and a great many who are afraid to try anything new. This isn't just a matter of taste, it's a thing we learn from the people around us as we grow up.

The second reason has to do with advertising and the Food Nazis. The health establishment and the popular press have given us some very strange ideas about food and health. The most extraordinary ideas about what is good and bad for you have been put forth over the years; much of it contradictory and very little of it based on good science. (The basics of good nutrition really haven't changed that much over the centuries; it just doesn't make for exciting reading.) There has been so much of this because people want to hear it. We want some magic simple diet or pill that will make everything all right so we can live forever, even if we don't enjoy it very much, and the food industry and their ad agencies are more than ready to pander to that. The fact that people fall for this line of thinking on their own is bad enough, but now there are some who would like to make laws about what is good to eat. These Food Nazis say that not eating right kills more people and causes more expensive health problems than tobacco or alcohol, therefore they should be able to decide what you eat based on whatever popular scientific belief is in vogue at the time. For me that's just going too far. We need to get back to the idea of really taking care of ourselves and not expecting the government to do it all. We need to stop thinking of food as medicine and tell the Food Nazis we don't want them in our lives.

Take some time to stop and smell the pot roast! The major part of living well is learning how to recognize and enjoy the good things in life. Don't cheat yourself.

Bikkies!







I got addicted to these "cookies" during my month in Australia. (People there call them biscuits, or bikkies.) They are fantastic! Every so often, my friends David and Glennie send me a little package from Oz... and I got one today! Thank you guys!



Happy durlx with Tim Tams, which were named
after the 1958 Kentucky Derby Winner



There was a package of the original and one of the Tim Tam White, which is also very good. I was dancing around the room yelping with happiness over my good fortune, when I was overcome with a strange impulse; I would give Robert one! (Usually, I snatch the package from the postman and look up and down the street to make sure no one saw it and then keep them all for myself.) Robert seemed to enjoy his Tim Tam and I had this wonderful feeling of having shared something precious. I thought about offering him another one, but, well there are limits...

Well, I just moments ago discovered that the original Tim Tams are being test marketed in California under the name "Double Trouble"! I am so excited! (Although I hate that name.) Those of you in California; buy them, write to Arnott's and tell them how much you love them. Make this test marketing a big success! Please. I can't live without them.




Yesterday, I went to the dentist. I no longer have the lousy dental insurance that came with my last job, so I was able to go back to the dentist that I like. He has an office with a glass wall on the 14th floor, he plays nice classical music and murmers reasuringly as he works. I love this dentist. I have had bad experiences with dentists in the past; filings that don't stay in, bad root canals, etc. This guy is good, not too expensive and everyone in the office is pleasant. I'm so glad I decided to go back to him.



I've mentioned Noah before in this journal. He's going through some weird health problems right now and could use your good wishes and thoughts.

A Sort Of Memorial Day






I lost my dear friend Margaret to fuking cancer a little over a year ago.

She was a good friend to me for a long time; it's strange, but it's hard for me to think that's she's gone. It seems more like she's just been away somewhere for a while. And there's a reason for that; this woman had more stories to tell than anyone else I've ever known. We were supposed to sit down and write them all out one day. I think we both imagined that we'd be sitting in some lovely retirement situation, reminiscing over a drink and a drool-proof keyboard and typing it all out for the amusement of all.




The thing is, her life was as interesting as anything you might read in a novel. As strange and beautiful as anything John Irving might write. I'm starting a list of the stories that I remember. I hope I can actually get them all down.



But just to give you a brief sketch; Margaret was six feet tall with a Carolina accent and a tremendous sense or personal dignity, (she would say thee-a-ter in sophisticated company and no one would think to correct her pronounciation), and she just knew everybody. She was heterosexual, but had a hard time convincing the lesbian population of that fact because she was just so amazingly larger than life. And then, she hung around with all of us gay guys. Now, she wasn't a "fag hag", she had many male admirers, she didn't need us; she chose us because we were more fun. She worked the AIDS services phone lines, she helped with the benefits and supported all the gay Mardi Gras krewes. She was invited to every great party. And if there wasn't a great party that night, we'd go out with Margaret and make one. She was a force of nature.




So Robert told me it was time to go put some flowers on her grave over in Slidell, across Lake Pontchartrain. So we went yesterday. We left New Orleans about one on the afternoon, but any which way you drive, you drive over water; New Orleans is surrounded by water.



The bend in the Mississippi River near my house






We crossed the lake on the I-10, stopped for some flowers and then
went to the cemetery. It's called Forest Lawn...





I think it's important that you know that Robert took very good care of Margaret when she was sick. (The nurses thought they were a couple, he was always there with her and the nurses or orderlies wondered why the both of them looked horrified when asked if he would like to look at the sutures!) The thing is, they both had enough of a sense of humor to over ride the bad stuff, at least most of it. I've paid tribute, of a sort, to Robert in this journal before, but this time, I will say this: he was Margaret's best friend. It's a high honor, believe me.




After a while we left and had a late lunch at Taco Bell. I just love to go to these places every once and a while! It's like eating in an orbiting space station! If I hadn't seen the ads on TV, I wouldn't have had any idea what was offered on the menu... It tasted OK, the hot sauce wasn't hot enough, the Pepsi tasted sort of like Dr. Pepper. I really enjoyed it, I can't think why I didn't take a picture.



Then it was time to beat the rush hour traffic! There are four highways across Lake Pontchartrain and the I-10 span is the most bearable. (Don't ever use the Pontchartrain Causway, "The longest bridge in the world" because it looks just like this the whole way...)








Soon we were in sight of home, sweet home, New Orleans.





Not a bad day, all in all.



In fact it was a beautiful day.




Chat and Other News



There's a new poll about chat and the purpose is to see what might be a good day for everyone. (or if anyone is interested..). Do read the post that accompanies the poll, there is some good info there about how you might use the chat feature. Also, read up on the poll feature; it's very kewl and everyone can use it.




Also, do vote for the monkey name! You have until next weekend. (I wanted to have time to send the prize package to the winner before Easter).




If there is anything you are unhappy with on the site or anything you particularly like, do e-mail me about it. I like to see your comments and I do answer e-mail.

Mainstream Gay Media



I read a quote from an article yesterday that questioned whether the new gay TV networks that are being developed would cover the full spectrum of gay organizations and causes, or just the "mainstream" ones like HRC, GLAAD and the Log Cabin Club. I thought it was a good question. I don't know the answer, but I do know one thing; thirty years ago, the question could not have been asked. There wasn't much gay media then, let alone a "mainstream" of it. This was, of course, before VCR's and video tapes, personal computers and the internet; but back then gays had almost no representation in print and virtually none in television and films either.

The picture at the top is the kind of image one might find in a "physique pictorial", which you might find in a newstand in a large city, along with nudist magazines and the laughable "penis enlargement" mags, (Modern Penis Enlargement Techniques: A Philosophic Approach. -Fully Illustrated-). They were cheaply produced and printed, expensive and hard to find. Other than the fact that these publications featured pictures of naked men, there really wasn't anything gay about them. In fact, the subject of sexual orientation was carefully avoided.


There was one glossy source of beefcake in the 70's, After Dark, which billed itself as "The National Magazine of Entertainment". It covered the world of theater, dance and film and was aimed at the emerging gay market. There were usually a few arty nude photos of actors or dancers, but the word "gay" wasn't used. Still, the magazine provided lots of hints that there were gay people out there living interesting lives. The Advocate was just getting started around this time, but it was small and hard to get in most of the country; subscriptions were mailed in plain brown wrappers. The face of gay culture was simply not reflected by the media then; gays in most of the country had no idea just how many of us there were.

When I look back on that time, it's almost hard to remember how it was. I expect that younger people have a hard time imagining a time when gay images and gay news and gay television weren't available, when there was almost no place to go for affirmation and information. Or even to read a gay man's journal.


Now, the images are everywhere, or nearly so, and the process of "mainstreaming" has begun, as it will whenever a marketing department is involved. The major magazines and shows like "Will and Grace" and Queer As Folk" are commercial ventures and as such they try to appeal to the widest audience while offending the fewest potential members. It's the way things work. But I think we need to try to present the broadest possible picture of gay life; there's a lot of room at the table and we all know how it feels to be on the outside of things.

Personally, I still get a bit of a shock sometimes from a hot scene in a film or, say, QAF. I remember a time when it was almost unimaginable that such a thing would be shown. We've come along way in thirty years.

Driving through a rainy night with the radio on...


It was when I was in upstate NY staying with my Dad in the country, after my Mom had died. I was driving back home after a night at Borders where I went just to be with people and books for an evening. The car FM radio was on and tuned to a station that played jazz and blues; really one of the best radio stations I've ever run across in my travels. They played the best selection of songs; all the greats from the past and a lot of new people I'd bever heard of, but really good. For some reason, I couldn't get the station in my Dad's house, only on the car radio. I found myself driving a lot, late at night. Well, on this particular night, they played this incredible version of "Roxanne" the song by Sting. It was so sweet. And so gay...

The song ended and the announcer said "That was George Michael from his new CD Songs From The Last Century"


It was startling! I hadn't really paid all that much attention to pop during the time that Wham! was around, or during his career following that. I mean, I knew he was a cute young thing with a lot of popular hits. I thought the videos on MTV were interesting. I was sure he was gay. But I never really listened to the music, I just noticed it; good to bop around to when it came on in a bar. And here was this really intelligent, talented and very gay interpretation of a song. I got the Songs From The Last Century CD and really liked it. There are these great songs and the focus on them is all man to man. "Liz Taylor is not his style, and even Ricky Martin's smile... is something he can't see.... My baby just cares for me."

I got a laptop when I realized that I would be "up north" for longer than I had first anticipated and it came with a DVD player and three free DVD's. There wasn't the greatest selection, but one of them was "Ladies and Gentlemen: The Best Of George Michael". It had all his videos with the option to see the lyrics on the screen, like subtitles, and I found the lyrics rather engaging. I realised that he wasn't just a pretty pop person; he could actually write a great song with some depth.

My favorite, I think, is "Kissing a Fool".

You are far, when I could have been your star
You listened to people
Who scared you to death, and from my heart
Strange that you were strong enough
To even make a start
But you'll never find peace of mind
Till you listen to your heart

People, you can never change the way they feel
Better let them do just what they will
For they will, If you let them
Steal your heart from you
People,Will always make a lover feel a fool
But you knew I loved you
We could have shown them all
We should have seen love through

Fooled me with the tears in your eyes
Covered me with kisses and lies
So good-bye, but please don't take my heart

You are far, I'm never gonna be your star
I'll pick up the pieces and mend my heart
Maybe I'll be strong enough, I don't know where to start
But I'll never find peace of mind, while I listen to my heart
People, you can never change the way they feel
Better let them do just what they will
For they will, If you let them, steal your heart

And people, will always make a lover feel a fool
But you knew I loved you,
We could have shown them all
We should have seen love through

But remember this, every other kiss,
That you ever give, long as we both live
When you need the hand of another man
One you really can surrender with
I will wait for you, like I always do
There's something there, that can't compare
With any other

You are far
When I could have been your star
You listened to people
Who scared you to death, and from my heart
Strange that I was wrong enough
To think you'd love me too.
I guess you were kissing a fool

You must have been kissing a fool

O.K. He was in the closet for a long time, but when he got caught, he came out with a vengeance; the video "outside" is an example. The gay text was always there, and who knows how much pressure there was from the record company...

I think he's really great.






BTW, have you seen my monkey?